This petition is so farcical it must be a joke... right?
A Change.org petition is making somehefty demands - there's no way it's serious
A Change.org petition is demanding that Starfield - Bethesda's upcoming sci-fi RPG - becomes a PS5 exclusive. With over 1,000 signatures, it's got to be a joke, right? No one could possibly think this was actually possible? As the freshly stoked flames of the second great console war flicker online, can someone actually believe this is possible?
Starfield was first teased back in 2018 and has been a permanent fixture on many a gamer's hype list ever since. However, with Bethesda now firmly on team Microsoft for some time now, it's upcoming AAA spacefaring blockbuster will be releasing on Xbox consoles and PC only. PlayStation fans are being in for a cold, Starfieldless winter.
This petition, titled 'Make Starfield a PS5 EXCLUSIVE!!!!' and holding firm with a whopping 1,037 signatures as of writing. Whether or not it's a genuine petition or just a funny gag at the expense of PS5 stans with comically unrealistic expectations is up in the air, but it's well worth a read nonetheless on entertainment merits alone.
It was put out into the world by a sole brave PlayStation warrior going by Benjamin Dickey, who writes the following as their opening argument:
"For over a decade Bethesda games have been released on PlayStation. They perform better on PlayStation, run better, and sell better. Xbox and specially Phil Spencer have NO BUSINESS taking them away." First of all, you've gotta give it to Dickey for this short but sweet starting arguement justo n passion alone. He's in it to win it.
He is wrong, it's worth noting. The Xbox Series X is packing more power under the hood than the PS5. The reason the PS5 is outselling the Xbox Series X in the UK and beyond right now is becuase that console has better exclusives on it, at least in the mind of the general market.
In fairness that's not really a fight Xbox signed up for - its goal this generation is quite clearly to get you subscribing to Game Pass rather than forking out £70 for every hot new game. Each console have its perks, make love not war, man! As for Bethesda games selling better on PlayStation, there's no real data to support this either. Consoles in general did seem to outsell the PC though, interesting right?
Back to this petition: the remaining 580 words continue the trend in hitting every memeable console war point out there right now. Again, you should read it yourself, but some choice quotes just I've got to highlight "Second, Xbox and its 12 dedicated players do NOT deserve Starfield or any exclusivity. Not only are they arrogant and annoying but since the showcase they have been irritating," and the concluding note, "I dont need trolls coming here to complain that we actually care about gaming and I dont care how many of you come to insult me. Cry, cope, seethe, and mald Xbots!" Brilliant.
As you can imagine, this petition has garnered mixed reactions. "I'm signing because I want to leave a comment telling you that you're pathetic and need to get a life!" writes Penelope K, clearly in camp Xbox and prepping to take to the stars with Todd in a few months. In fact, it looks like a lot of people have thrown in their signatures just for a chance to dunk on Dickey directly.
"I really wanted to let you know this is the stupidest argument I've ever seen! You're fucken delusional of you actually think this will work. F**king moron," pens James Davis with the eloquent touch of a renaissance painter. They're joined by a fellow James who just popped in to let Benjamin know: "I guarantee you're the kind of moron who loves it when xbox gets screwed out of titles by PS and now you're butthurt the shoe is on the other foot. Freaking pathetic dude!"
If Benjamin is trolling, then great job mate, you've done good work here. If he's being serious, then it stands out as a perfect example of the reinvigorated console war that seems to have been without ceasefire for many months now. Trust us - we see it in our Twitter mentions all the time! Something about this current generation of consoles has got people fired up, calling up those fiery new soldiers willing to lay their online lives down for the cause, as well as the old veterans to whom the war never really ended.
If you are a PlayStation-only player, don't feel too bad. Without Starfield, you've got over 100GB to spend on a bunch of other cool games to play instead. It's a packed September this year - I'm sure Armored Core 6 can keep you warm at night.
What do you think - is this petition real or just a great gag? Also, while we're here, screw it! Which console is better: PS5 or Xbox Series X? I want all of you lot who have been calling us both Microsoft and Sony shills (occasionally at the same time) to lay out your arguments below. Go wild!