How to make Sims polyamorous in The Sims 4 Lovestruck
The new Romantic Boundaries system in The Sims 4 allows you to modify your Sims' feelings on monogamy in a series first.
The addition of a long-awaited polyamory option is one of the big selling points of The Sims 4 Lovestruck expansion pack and its accompanying base game update. Gone are the days of sneaking around behind your Sim partners' backs when all you want to do is practise ethical non-monogamy with EA's blessing — but rest assured, if it's cheating drama you're after, that hasn't gone anywhere either.
Polyamory is pretty simple to set up in The Sims 4 now, but it's not quite as straightforward as flipping an on/off switch, either. Read on below for all the details you need to know to make your Sims polyamorous in The Sims 4 Lovestruck.
How to make Sims polyamorous in The Sims 4
Being able to practise polyamory in The Sims 4 isn't dependent on owning the Lovestruck expansion pack, as Patch 162 introduces Romantic Boundaries to the base game as well. These new Romantic Boundaries are what make polyamory a viable possibility in the vanilla game now (because we all know that modders have had a similar setup in place for years).
A Sim's Romantic Boundaries can be edited in CAS under the Gender tab. This is where customised Gender and Sexual Orientation options have already lived for a while now, and can be accessed using a mirror or dresser, or directly via the new Romantic Boundaries subheading in the Simology tab.
Here you'll see three basic types of romantic interaction listed:
- Non-Physical Romance (e.g. flirting, compliments)
- Physical Romance excluding WooHoo (e.g. hand-holding, kissing)
- WooHoo
For each of these interaction types, you can now select whether your Sim becomes jealous if their romantic partner engages in this type of behaviour with another Sim.
This allows you to create a variety of different romantic jealousy conditions for your Sims, rather than the previous one-size-fits-all approach. For instance, you can now have broadly monogamous Sims who nevertheless don't become furious if another Sim gets a bit flirtatious with their partner, which anyone who's dealt with TS4's NPC autonomy before will no doubt be very happy to learn. Alternatively, you could set up a couple who don't mind one another WooHooing about the place, but draw the line at their partner catching feelings and making lovey-dovey eyes at their FWB.
And, of course, you can set all three options to no jealousy if you want to create a fully and openly polyamorous set-up. Sim throuples rejoice, you can now live under one roof in harmony if you so choose without everyone being in a dreadful mood all the time.
![The Sims 4's Create-A-Sim, open to the new Romantic Boundaries tab.](https://assetsio.gnwcdn.com/the-sims-4-lovestruck-romantic-boundaries.jpg?width=690&quality=70&format=jpg&auto=webp)
There's also a fourth option available: open to changing. Much like the "exploring romantically" option under sexual orientation customisation, selecting "yes" here means that your Sim might organically change their Romantic Boundaries preferences over time in response to interactions they have with other Sims in Live Mode.
All four settings are set to "yes" by default, so if you want your Sims to be anything less than strictly monogamous under all circumstances, you'll either need to edit them in CAS or put in some groundwork directing your Sims to have those important conversations with their partners negotiating their respective boundaries. (Note: this is generally also a good idea in real life, where you can't edit each other in CAS.)
Finally, just bear in mind that one Sim's Romantic Boundaries don't directly influence another's, even if they're established partners. Just because Bob wouldn't mind if Betty smooched Bella at the bar doesn't mean Betty's gonna be thrilled if Bob hooks up with Mortimer right in front of her. Bear that in mind when establishing your Sims' relationship set-ups… or don't, if you're looking to add a little dramatic tension to your game.
For more on TS4, be sure to check out our essential The Sims 4 cheats page!