You can hire someone to play Call of Duty WW2 for you, and I can't even

Oh good, a way to level up in Call of Duty WW2 while exposing yourself to privacy breaches! Huzzah!

There's no shortage of slightly sketchy markets in gaming, but it's still pretty gross to stumble across one prominently displayed. The latest example is a scheme to advance in Call of Duty WW2's multiplayer without actually playing the game. Just hire a professional gamer who will do all the grinding and leveling for you on Bidvine! What's more, you can be hired as one of these professional gamers! It's a win-win situation for everyone! I just threw up in my mouth a little!

The service is offered on Bidvine, a blog geared towards pairing freelancers and other professionals with those who could use a hand with various projects. Posts are typically geared towards fields like photography or self-improvement, but yesterday pages were created for those looking to hire players and those looking to become professional players themselves at a minimum rate of £15 an hour.

And to make the whole thing feel scuzzier, the blog posts try to appeal to your nostalgic gaming memories. "I’m sure most COD players out there will remember the days of trying to get Autumn on Modern Warfare 2 (oh the good old days), and the amount of time that went into it," one post reads. "You’ll effectively be spending that time on your customer’s behalf!"

In case it isn't abundantly obvious, this is not a good idea. First of all, you're not guaranteed any level of success from a third-party arrangement like this. Second of all, it leaves you vulnerable to all kinds of privacy concerns - you'd either have to give the professional player your login information, or directly loan your console to them, neither of which are great prospects when most accounts bundle financial and personal information these days.

And to be clear, it's not much better for the hired players. While an FAQ at least addresses the option of changing your passwords, one recommendation is that professional players present "a copy of their ID or a piece of collateral", effectively trading one privacy risk for another.

Perhaps now's a good time to mention that we offer all kinds of strategy guides on Call of Duty WW2 and many other games - and we won't ask for your driver's license or anything.

So maybe use those instead? Please?